On March 3, Reggie and I will celebrate 7 years of marriage. I am an internal processor and introspective. So, I have already started quietly reflecting. There are a number of things I have evaluated and re-evaluated. Questions I asked and answered. Lessons and challenges revisited. The night/morning this was written, I was in such a state of mind. Exactly where am I? What have I accomplished? What have I learned? How have I grown? How has my life been impacted by our marriage? How has Reggie made me a better woman? How have I..?
Notice something? Yeah. These questions about our marriage are all about me.
Me. I. The anti-marriage focus.
The interesting thing is, the passage that came to mind to combat this train of thought (or path towards destruction, if you will...) was not your traditional marriage passage. We have attended marriage conferences and seminars (Weekend to Remember, Love and Respect, Art of Marriage). We have read relationship books and attended both pre-marital and marital classes (DNA of Relationships, Five Love Languages, etc). We answered 101 questions before we got engaged (yes, that is really a pre-engagement book). We participated in pre-marital counseling and took assessments.
In most (if not all), this familiar passage in Ephesians is addressed "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord... Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church..." (Ephesians 5:22-33). And, this passage in Genesis and Ephesians, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will be one flesh."(Genesis 2:24).
So, I sort of expected to be rebuked with one of those.
No.
This is the passage that God brought to mind:
Kim, in your marriage "If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ (which you've had), if any comfort from his love (which you have), if any fellowship with his Spirit (which you have), if any tenderness and compassion (which you have), then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider <your husband> as better than <yourself>. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interest of <the other>"*. (Philippians 2:1-4)
Ouch.
*italics are added for my emphasis
